I can’t swim in the ocean because I’m allergic to seafood.
The doctors say the reason I have floaters is genetic, but I think it’s cause I keep rinsing my contact lenses in Dr. Pepper.
Some say cigarettes kill, but they actually burn.
What are Canadian Blood Services employees called? Mosquitoes.
What do you call a bodybuilder that doesn’t read books? A dumbbell.
In a study published by Mintel, 58% of adults drink non-dairy milk. I prefer breast milk.
I never gain weight because I have a bottomless pit in my stomach that’s made of Quicksand.