The breast time in my life is when I was breastfeeding.
The best way to show your mom that you love her as a baby is to suck on her breasts like you’re starving.
When a pregnant woman is angry she makes steamed milk.
I saw a pregnant woman in the hospital that looked like she was going to pop like a bag of microwaved popcorn so I put a bowl under her. It saved the babies life.
What do you call a baby without a diaper? A Shithead.
What do you spank a baby with? A baby spoon.
My mom refused to breast fed me when I was growing up, she said her nipples were always in pain because I would constantly bite them. What can I say, I’m a breast man!