When a couch potato drinks too much alcohol he becomes mashed.
When a pregnant woman is angry she makes steamed milk.
What do people think when they see a cute dog? Is he going to hump my leg?
When I was a kid I used to play with my mom’s boobs until her milk became Miracle Whip.
When I use my dad’s Beats headphones I get a spanking. Now I know why they call them that.
After I make love to a woman she gets a hangover and never wants to do it again.
Money in Canada isn’t backed by gold it’s backed by the oil industry. It’s made of plastic.